‘We’re Just People’
One of the things I like most about writing and storytelling is interviewing people. No matter what the story is or what it is for, I always like to end the interview with this question:
When people read your story, what do you want them to know about you?
Every time, the interviewee has to pause and think. The answer is what sculpts their stories.
Madison Kirkpatrick is 25 years old, excitedly engaged and an aspiring physical therapist. She enjoys the outdoors and rock climbing. She is easy to talk to and speaks eloquently from the heart.
I spoke with her on the phone for 15 minutes, in between her classes, various labs and non-stop studying. For me, this was a project for work. I write content about students, faculty and staff at the University of St. Augustine for Health Sciences (USAHS). For Madison, this was an opportunity to share her story and be a voice for the community she has grown to love. Her story unfortunately never got published for work, so I decided to publish it here.
Madison’s answer to that final interview question – “We’re just people.”
Madison is in her fourth trimester of studies, about halfway through the USAHS Doctor of Physical Therapy Program at the Austin, Texas campus and she plans on specializing in pelvic floor.
“I always knew I was a part of the LGBTQ community,” Madison said. Although she does not like labels, she considers herself pansexual.
“I don’t care what anatomy a person has or what gender they identify or don’t identify with,” she said as she explained pansexuality. “I really just connect with the person.”
Growing up in a small, rural town in Northern California, and a repressive home environment, Madison kept her sexuality a secret for 23 years before coming out to her parents. Neither of them took well to the news, and despite efforts to mend their relationship over the past two years, things haven’t gotten much better. Her father won’t be walking her down the aisle at her wedding. She’s decided that unfortunately the best and healthiest thing to do is to cut ties.
When she decided to move to Texas to attend graduate school, her mom urged her to not be open about being LGBTQ in fear of her safety.
“I spent 23 years not being out and not living my truth, so I said I’m not going to do that,” Madison said.
As a new member of the Austin community, Madison and her fiancé haven’t found a support system or community of close friends just yet. They attend LGBTQ events at their rock-climbing gym and free events around the community, but it’s mostly just the two of them.
Everywhere she goes, there are people who stare at her or look at her differently. She’s found a friend group at school, but only half of the group is fully supportive. The other half says they don’t mind that she is part of the LGBTQ community, but they don’t agree with it.
“If being out was a ‘normal thing’ in society, I probably wouldn’t be doing this interview right now,” she said.
Despite the strain coming out put on her relationship with her parents and added difficulty navigating new friendships, she’s received endless love from her older brother and his wife. They are ecstatic about Madison living her truth.
“My brother told me that he is proud of who I am,” Madison said. “And that his daughters have such a great role model in me.”
Although it was technically my job to talk to Madison, I’m glad I had the opportunity. It wasn’t a conversation filled with controversy. It was a conversation about being treated like a human being. A simple desire we all have, but not all of us get to enjoy.
Madison likes being an advocate for the LGBTQ community. She hopes her voice can help somebody else, so they don’t have to go through the same things she has. She wants everyone to know that LGBTQ community members are just people. She also urges people to learn about the community and have an understanding about its diverse group of members.
“We’re doing the same things that everybody else is doing and we want the same things that everybody else wants,” she said. “I want to marry the woman of my dreams. I want to help people.”
I could hear her voice quiver as she searched for the right words to explain such simple concepts we all understand. The urge in her voice to give the LGBTQ community a chance. A chance at love, a chance at friendship, a chance at acceptance.
“There is so much more to life than the standard and exclusive status quo," Madison said. "Try to get to know us and try to leave whatever judgements or preconceived notions at the door, just talk to us.”
Madison and her fiancé, Lily, are getting married August 31, 2019.
I’d like to wish them a lifetime of love, happiness and respect.